Me pēhea te whakanui ake i te harikoa i runga i te rangahau hinengaro
He maha ngā wā ka whakaarohia te harikoa he mea "ka puta noa mai" ina pai ake ngā āhuatanga o te ao: he mahi pai, he haumaru pūtea, me ngā whanaungatanga maeneene. Heoi, e whakaatu ana ngā rangahau hinengaro ehara i te mea ko ngā āhuatanga o waho anake te mea e whakatauhia ai te harikoa, engari ko ō tātou whanonga hinengaro, te kounga o ō tātou whanaungatanga, te āhua o tā tātou whakamārama i ngā wheako, me ō tātou whanonga o ia rā. Ko te rongo pai, he maha o ēnei āhuatanga ka taea te whakangungu. Ka matapakihia e tēnei tuhinga ngā huarahi hei whakanui ake i te harikoa, me te tautokona e ngā kitenga hinengaro—ehara i te mea ko te hihiri anake—kia taea ai te whakamahi pai i roto i ō tātou oranga o ia rā.
1) Whakatairangahia ngā whanaungatanga pāpori mahana, pumau hoki.
Ko tētahi o ngā kitenga tino pumau i roto i te hinengaro oranga ko te hononga kaha o te kounga o ngā whanaungatanga pāpori ki te harikoa. Ehara i te mea ko te maha o ngā hoa anake, engari ko tō rātou piripono, te wairua haumaru, me te tautoko kare ā-roto. Mā ngā whanaungatanga pai ka wātea he wāhi hei māramatanga mā tātou, hei āwhina i a tātou i ngā wā uaua, hei whakapuaki i ngā harikoa. Ahakoa ngā taunekeneke poto, pai hoki—te mihi ki tētahi hoa noho, te kōrero poto ki tētahi hoa mahi—ka taea te whakapai ake i tō tātou wairua.
Ngā mahi hei whakamātau:
– Whakaritea he wā auau mō ngā tāngata nui (hei tauira, 1–2 ngā wā i te wiki).
– Whakaharatauhia te "whakarongo kaha": titiro kanohi ki a rātou, whakarāpopototia, kātahi ka pātai i ngā pātai whai muri.
– Whakanuia ngā "hononga moroiti" o ia rā: te mihi, te whakatenatena i tētahi, te pātai pono rānei mō te āhua o te tangata.
2) Whakaharatauhia te whakawhetai, kaua ko te "whakawhetai" anake
Ko te wawaotanga hinengaro pai e tino rangahauhia ana ko te whakangungu whakawhetai. Mā te whakawhetai ka āwhina te roro kia aro ake ki ngā mea pai, kia kore ai e aro ki ngā raruraru. Heoi, ko te mea whai hua ehara i te mea ko te akiaki i a koe kia "whakawhetai," engari ko te whakaharatau i te kaha ki te kite i te pai tūturu me te mārama he aha te tikanga o taua mea.
Te mahi māmā:
– Tuhia “e toru ngā mea pai i tēnei rā” i ia pō mō ngā wiki e rua.
– Tāpirihia he take: “E mihi ana ahau ki a X nā Y.” Hei tauira: “E mihi ana ahau ki taku hoa mō te tuku karere mai ki ahau, nā te mea ka iti ake te mokemoke i ahau.”
– Tuhia he "reta whakawhetai" ki tētahi i ia wā, i ia wā (ka taea e koe te tuku, ka taea rānei te kore). He maha ngā rangahau e whakaatu ana ka taea e tēnei te whakapiki i ngā kare ā-roto pai.
3) Whakanuia ngā mahi whai tikanga, kaua ko ngā mahi ngahau anake.
He maha ngā wā ka wehewehea e te hinengaro te "ahuareka" me te "tikanga." He mea nui ngā mea e rua, engari ko te harikoa pumau ake ka puta mai i ngā mahi whai tikanga: te āwhina i ētahi atu, te ako i tētahi mea wero, te whakatutuki i ngā kawenga, te takoha rānei ki tētahi hapori. Tērā pea ka whakaratohia he whakangahau wā poto e te ngākau harikoa tere (pēnei i te panuku mutunga kore), engari kāore e tino whakapiki ake i te makona o te ao.
Me pēhea te tono:
– Tuhia he rārangi o ngā mahi hei āwhina i a koe kia "whai hua" kia "ora ake" rānei.
– Whakamahia te mātāpono 80/20: kāore koe e hiahia ki te whakakore i ngā whakangahau, engari kia whakarite kia whai wāhi ngā mahi whai tikanga i ia wiki.
– Whakamātauria ngā mahi tautoko i te hapori: te āwhina i tētahi hoa mahi, te mahi tūao, te mahi noa rānei i ngā mahi atawhai iti i runga i te hiahia.
4) Whakawhanakehia he tikanga o te "rere": te rumaki i a koe ki ngā mahi wero.
Ko te ariā o te rere (mai i ngā rangahau a Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi) e whakaahua ana i tētahi āhua o te arotahi nui, te tere o te wā, ā, ka pai te ahua o ngā mahi. He maha ngā wā ka puta te rere ina taurite ngā wero me ngā pūkenga: kāore i te tino ngāwari ki te wāhi e hoha ai, ā, kāore hoki i te tino uaua ki te wāhi e whakarihariha ai. Ko te hunga e pāngia ana e te rere i ngā wā katoa ka nui ake te oranga.
Ngā mahi whai hua:
– Kōwhiria ngā mahi he mārama te whāinga (hei tauira, tuhia kia 300 kupu, ako mō te 20 meneti).
– Whakaitihia ngā mea hei whakararuraru: whakawetohia ngā whakamōhiotanga i ngā wā poto.
– Whakanuia mārire te wero kia mau tonu te hihiri.
5) Whakahaerehia ngā whakaaro kino mā roto i ngā tikanga CBT
Ehara te harikoa i te tikanga kāore he pouri. He mea noa ngā kare ā-roto kino. Heoi, ko te whakaaroaro tonu (te whakaaro tonu ki ngā whakaaro kino me te kore e whakatauhia) ka kaha ake te ahotea me te whakaiti i te wairua. Ko te Whakaora Whanoke Hinengaro (CBT) he huarahi kua whakamātauhia e te pūtaiao hei āwhina i te whakahaere i ngā tauira whakaaro kore āwhina.
Tikanga whakarāpopototanga CBT:
– Tāutuhia ngā whakaaro aunoa: “He tangata rahua ahau,” “Kei te whakahengia ahau e te katoa.”
– Whakamātautau taunakitanga: He aha ngā meka e tautoko ana/e whakahē ana?
– Waihangahia he whakaaro rerekē e tino pono ake ana: “I hē ahau, engari ka taea e au te ako me te whakatika.”
– Pātai atu: “He aha ngā mahi iti ka taea e au te mahi i tēnei wā tonu?” Arotahi ki ngā mahi hei whakaiti i te whakaaroaro koretake.
6) Te nekehanga me te moe: ngā pūtake koiora o te harikoa
E whakaatu tonu ana ngā rangahau he hononga te whakakori tinana auau ki te pai ake o te wairua, te iti iho o te manukanuka, me te pai ake o te kounga o te moe. Ka pā te whakakori tinana ki ngā neurotransmitters me te pūnaha ahotea. He mea nui anō hoki te moe ki te whakahaere i ngā kare ā-roto: ina kore e moe, ka nui ake te pukuriri, te manukanuka, ā, ka uaua ki te pārekareka ki ngā mea pai.
Ngā whāinga tūturu:
– Tīmata ki te hikoi tere mō te 10–20 meneti, 3–5 ngā wā i te wiki.
– Waihangahia he tikanga moe: he ōrite te roa o te wā moe me te wā oho ake, whakaitihia te wā e pā ana ki te mata 30–60 meneti i mua i te moe.
Kaua e tatari kia puta te hihiri; waihangahia he kaupapa poto engari kia rite tonu.
7) Te aro nui ki te whakapai ake i te whanaungatanga ki ngā wheako o nāianei
Ko te aro nui ko te kaha ki te aro ki ngā wheako o nāianei me te waiaro tuwhera, kore whakahāwea. He maha ngā rangahau e whakaatu ana ka taea e te aro nui te whakaiti i te ahotea, te āwhina ki te whakahaere i ngā kare ā-roto, me te whakanui ake i te makona o te ao. Ehara i te mea ko te "whakakore i te hinengaro," engari ko te mōhio ki ngā whakaaro he kaupapa hinengaro, ehara i te mea he meka tuturu.
Whakangungu 5 meneti:
– Kia arotahi ki te manawa.
– Ina kopikopiko te hinengaro, mātakitaki "āe, kei te whakaaro ahau", kātahi ka hoki ki te manawa.
– Me mahi i ia rā mō ngā wiki e rua kia kitea ai te hua.
8) Whakawhāitihia te whakataurite pāpori me te whakahaere i te whakamahinga pāpāho pāpori.
I roto i te hinengaro, ka ngāwari te whakaoho i ngā kare ā-roto o te koretake i te whakataurite pāpori, inā koa ka whakataurite tātou i ō tātou ake oranga i muri i ngā whakaaturanga me ngā mea nui o ētahi atu. Ka whakakaha ake te pāpāho pāpori i tēnei ia. E whakaatu ana ngā rangahau he mea nui ake te momo whakamahinga i te roanga o te wā: ko te whakamahinga koretake (panuku koretake) he kino ake i te whakamahinga hohe (taunekeneke, tiritiri, me te hanga whanaungatanga).
Ngā rautaki hei āwhina:
– Whakatauhia he wā motuhake hei whakatuwhera i ngā pāpāho pāpori.
– Whakaititia ngā pūkete e whakaoho ana i te hae, i te manukanuka rānei.
– Whakakapia ki tētahi mahi tūturu: waea atu ki tētahi hoa, pānui pukapuka, whakakorikori tinana, mahi rānei i tētahi mahi whakangahau.
9) Whakatakotoria he whāinga mārama, he whāinga ine - kātahi ka whakanuia ngā ahunga whakamua iti.
Mā ngā whāinga ka puta he aronga me te mana whakahaere. Heoi, ko ngā whāinga nunui rawa, kāore i te mārama ka taea te taumaha rawa. E kī ana te hinengaro hihiri kia wehewehea ngā whāinga ki ngā mahi iti ake, kia whakapakarihia hoki ngā tikanga mā te mōhio ki te ahunga whakamua.
Tauira:
– Engari ko te kī "e hiahia ana koe kia harikoa ake," hurihia ki te "haereere mō te 20 meneti e toru ngā wā i te wiki" me te "tuhi rānei i roto i tētahi puka mihi mō ngā meneti 10 i ia pō."
– Whakanuia ngā ahunga whakamua iti: kaua e nui rawa, engari kia mihi ki te whakapau kaha kia hono ai te roro i te whanonga ki ngā wheako pai.
Whakatau: he pūkenga te harikoa ka taea te whakangungu.
Ehara te harikoa i te āhua pumau ka tutukihia kotahi, mō ake tonu atu. He rite tonu ki tētahi pūkenga: he mea awe nā ngā tikanga, te taiao pāpori, te hauora tinana, me te hinengaro. E ai ki ngā rangahau hinengaro, ko ngā mahi tino whai hua he iti ake te whakamiharo, engari he rite tonu: te whakapakari i ngā whanaungatanga, te whakamahi i te whakawhetai, te whakanui ake i ngā mahi whai tikanga, te whakahaere i ngā whakaaro, te pupuri i te moe me te nekehanga, me te whakamahi i te aro nui. Tīmata ki tētahi, ki ētahi tikanga ngāwari rānei, piri ki aua tikanga mō te 2–4 wiki, kātahi ka aromatawai. He nui ake te pānga o ngā huringa iti, pumau i ngā mahere nui ka hohoro te whakarērea.
Ki te hiahia koe, ka taea e au te whakarite i tēnei tuhinga mō tētahi hunga whakarongo motuhake (taiohi, kaimahi tari, mātua), ka taea rānei te tāpiri i tētahi rārangi tohutoro rangahau whaimana ake.
