Ngā Tikanga mō te Whakakore i te Ārai i roto i te Tohutohu
I roto i te tukanga tohutohu, he maha ngā wā ka tūtaki ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro ki ngā kiritaki e ahua "kati ana," e ngāwari ana ki te whakakahore, ki te karo i ētahi kaupapa, ki te kore rānei e whakaae ki ngā urupare. E mōhiotia ana tēnei momo urupare ko te ārai. Ehara te ārai i te "pakari noa iho," engari he huarahi a te kiritaki ki te tiaki i a rātou anō mai i ngā kare ā-roto whakararuraru pērā i te wehi o te whakahē, te whakama, te mataku, te manukanuka rānei kei ngaro te mana whakahaere. Ki te kore e arohia tika, ka taea e te ārai te aukati i te hanganga o tētahi whanaungatanga whakaora, te whakaroa i te tūhuratanga o ngā take, me te whakaroa i ngā wā. Nō reira, he mea nui kia mārama ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro ki ngā pūtake o te ārai me te whakamahi i ngā tikanga tika hei whakaiti i te ārai me te kore e akiaki i te kiritaki.
Te Mārama ki ngā Āhua me ngā Pūtake o te Parepare
Ka kitea te tiaki i roto i ngā momo āhua: te whakapae a ngā kiritaki i ētahi atu, te whakamāori rawa i ngā whanonga ("Pēnei ahau nā te mea..."), te whakarerekē kaupapa, te tuku whakautu poto, te whakatoi, te whakahē rānei i ngā whakamārama a te kaitohutohu. Tērā pea ka āhua whakaae ētahi kiritaki engari he tiaki tonu, hei tauira, te kī tonu "āe" engari kāore e mahi i tetahi mea i waho o te wā wānanga.
He rerekē ngā pūtake. Tuatahi, ngā wheako o mua: kua whakapaetia, kua whakamatia, kua uiuitia rānei ngā kiritaki, ā, ka āhua whakamataku te mahi tohutohu. Tuarua, ngā uara ahurea me ngā uara whānau: kua whakaakona ētahi tāngata kia kaua e whakapuaki i ngā take whaiaro i waho o te kāinga. Tuatoru, te wehi kei ngaro te whakaaro ki a ia anō: ko te whakaae ki ngā hapa ka rite ki te "hinganga." Tuawhā, ko ētahi āhuatanga hinengaro pēnei i te manukanuka, te whara, ngā wheako rānei ki ngā whanaungatanga morearea ka taea hoki te whakanui ake i te tūpato o ngā kiritaki. Mā te mārama ki ēnei pūtake ka āwhina i ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro ki te whiriwhiri i ngā wawaotanga tika me te karo i ngā waiaro tautohetohe e whakapakari ana i te tiaki.
1. Hangaia he Hononga Hauora Mai i te Tīmatanga
Ko te tikanga matua mō te wikitoria i te ārai ko te hanga i te wairua haumaru mā te hononga whakaora. Kei roto i tēnei ko te aroha, te whakaae kore-whakahē, me te ōritetanga. Me whakamārama e ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro te anga o te tohutohu: te muna, ngā whāinga, ngā tūranga kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro-kiritaki, me te tika o te kiritaki ki te whakakore i te whakautu. Ina rongo ngā kiritaki kei a rātou te mana whakahaere, ka heke ngā kare ā-roto o te tūpono.
Whakamahia he reo kāore e whakahihi ana, pērā i te: "Ka taea e tātou te kōrero mārire i tēnei, ā, kei a koe te tikanga ki te whiriwhiri ko ēhea wāhanga e pai ana ki a koe te whakapuaki." He tono tēnei momo rerenga kōrero kia mahi tahi tātou, kaua e tono.
2. Whakamanahia ngā kare ā-roto me te kore e whakamana i te whanonga kino
He maha ngā wā ka pohehetia te whakamana mō te whakaae. Ko te tikanga o te whakamana ko te whakaae he mārama ngā kare ā-roto o te kiritaki i roto i te horopaki o ō rātou wheako. Ina ārai te kiritaki, ka āwhina te whakamana ki te whakaiti i te taumahatanga me te waihanga wāhi mō te whakaaroaro.
Tauira: "Ka mārama ahau he aha koe ka pōuri ai ina whakaarahia tēnei kaupapa—te āhua nei kua maha ngā whakapae kei a koe." Muri iho, ka taea e te kaitohutohu te haere tonu ki te aro atu ki ngā hua whanonga: "I taua wā anō, ka taea hoki e tātou te titiro ki te pānga o tēnei ki tō kōrua whanaungatanga." Mā tēnei huinga ka noho tonu te whakaaro o te kiritaki kua whakaaetia, engari ka haere tonu te tukanga huringa.
3. Whakamahia te Whakaaroaro me te Whakamārama i ngā Kupu hei Whakaiti i te Ātete
Ko te whakaaroaro he tikanga matua mō te tohutohu: te whakahoki anō i te karere a te kiritaki ki te kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro kia mārama ai. I roto i ngā āhuatanga tiaki, ka āwhina te whakaaroaro i ngā kiritaki kia rongohia, kia whakaitihia ai te hiahia ki te tiaki i a rātou anō.
Hei tauira, ka mea pea te kiritaki, "Ehara ahau i te tangata riri, engari ka riri noa ahau." Ka whakautu pea te kaitohutohu, "Kei te whakaaro koe nā te āhuatanga tō tauhohenga, ehara i te mea nāu anō." Kia mārama te kiritaki, ka pātai atu pea te kaitohutohu, "Ka taea e tāua te titiro ki ngā wā motuhake e tino whakaoho ana i aua kare ā-roto?"
4. Pātaihia ngā Pātai Tuwhera Kāore e Pātai Ana
Ko ngā pātai koi rawa, whakamātautau rawa rānei ("He aha koe i pērā ai?") ka whakaoho i te ātete. Whakakapia ki ngā pātai tuwhera, tūhura, pērā i:
– “I aha i mua atu i tērā?”
– “Ko tēhea wāhanga te mea tino uaua ki a koe?”
– “He aha tāu e whakaaro ana e hiahiatia ana e koe i taua wā?”
– “He aha te tikanga o taua mea ki a koe?”
Mā tēnei tikanga ka nekehia te kaupapa tohutohu mai i te āhua "whakamātautau" ki te āhua "kitenga tahi". Ka taea hoki e ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro te whakamahi i ngā pātai tauine (0–10) kia ngāwari ake ai te kaupapa, hei tauira: "Kei te pēhea tō rite ki te kōrero mō tēnei i tēnei rā?"
5. Te Whakaōrite i ngā Urupare Ārai hei Tikanga Tiaki
Mā te whakataurite i ngā āhuatanga o te tangata ka āwhina i ngā kiritaki kia mārama ko te tiaki i te tangata ehara i te "hapa o te āhua," engari he urupare tangata. Ka taea e ngā kaitohutohu te kī, "He mea maori kia tupato ake koe ina puta ake tēnei kaupapa. He maha ngā tāngata e whakaaro pēnei ana ina kōrerohia ngā take tairongo." Mā tēnei ka māmā ake te tirotiro a ngā kiritaki i ā rātou ake urupare me te kore whakama.
Heoi, me āta whakamahi i te whakataurite kia kore ai e whakaitihia te kawenga. Whai muri i te whakataurite, ka taea e te kaitohutohu te whakatenatena i te kiritaki ki te aromatawai i te whai huatanga o te tikanga: "He āwhina tēnei i a koe i te wā roa, he tāpiri atu rānei ki ō raruraru?"
6. Āraia te tautohetohe wawe; Whakamahia te tautohetohe mahi tahi
Ehara te tautohetohe whai hua i roto i te mahi tohutohu i te "whakaeke," engari ko te tohu i te rerekētanga i waenga i ngā uara/whāinga o te kiritaki me ā rātou whanonga. Ki ngā kiritaki ārai, me mahi tahi tēnei me te whakaaetanga.
Tauira: "Kia taea e au te whakapuaki i tētahi kitenga? E mea ana koe e hiahia ana koe ki tētahi whanaungatanga marino ake, engari ina puta he pakanga, ka karohia e koe. He aha tāu e whakaaro ana kei te tupu i reira?" Pēnei, kāore te kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro e tū hei kaiwhakawā, engari hei hoa whakaaroaro tahi.
7. Whakamahia ngā Tikanga Uiui Whakahihiri (MI)
He tino āwhina te Uiuitanga Whakahihiko ki te wikitoria i te ātete nā te mea e aro nui ana tōna huarahi ki te mana motuhake o te kiritaki. Ko ngā mātāpono matua o te MI hei whakaiti i te ārai:
– Whakaatu i te aroha: te aroha pumau.
– Te whakawhanake i te rerekētanga: te whakawhanake i te mōhiotanga ki te āputa i waenga i ngā whāinga me ngā whanonga.
– Hurihuri me te ātete: kaua e whawhai ki te ātete; whai i te ia o te rere, kātahi ka huri i te huarahi.
– Tautoko i te whai mana ki a ia anō: tautoko i te whakapono o te kiritaki ka taea e ia te huri.
Ko ngā tikanga MI whaihua ko te whakarongo whakaaroaro me te whakaoho kōrero. Hei tauira: "Mēnā ka whakatau koe i tētahi rā ki te whakamātau i tētahi huarahi hou, he aha te tohu iti e whai hua ana?"
8. Kia Aro ki te Reo Tinana me te Rīpene o te Wāhanga
He maha ngā wā ka kitea te tiaki i te tangata mā te kore kōrero: te whakawhiti i ngā ringa, te titiro whakamuri, te reo teitei, te kata huna rānei. Ka taea e ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro te whakarerekē i te tere: te kōrero pōturi ake, te whakamutu, me te whakamahi i ngā tikanga whakaū māmā mēnā ka piki haere ngā kare ā-roto. I ētahi wā, mā te tuku i ētahi hēkona o te wā puku ka wātea te kiritaki ki te whakaiti i te riri me te whakaaro.
Me noho tuwhera hoki te tinana o ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro, me titiro kanohi kore e pēhi, me te pupuri i te reo mahana. Ahakoa te āhua iti o ēnei, he mea nui ēnei mō te noho haumaru.
9. Arotahi ki ngā Whāinga a te Kiritaki me ngā Kōwhiringa Iti, Pono hoki
He maha ngā wā ka whakaaro ngā kiritaki tiaki he wero nui te huringa. Nō reira, āwhina i ngā kiritaki ki te wehewehe i ngā whāinga ki ngā mahi iti, ka taea te whiriwhiri mā rātou anō. Engari ko te "Me huri koe," whakamahia ngā "kōwhiringa": "He maha ngā huarahi ka taea e koe te whakamātau—ko tēhea te mea tino pea māu e mahi i tēnei wiki?"
Mā te whakanui i te kōwhiringa, ka whakaitihia te riri me te whakanui ake i te mana whakahaere a ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro. Ko ngā kiritaki e whai mana ana ka nui ake te tuwhera.
10. Whakahaere i te Ārai a te Kaitohutohu (Whakawhitiwhiti Kōrero)
Ehara i te mea he mea motuhake ki ngā kiritaki te tiaki i a rātou anō. Ka taea hoki e ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro te tiaki i a rātou anō ina rongo rātou kua whakakahoretia, kāore e āwhina, kua "whakamātauria" rānei. Mēnā ka whakautu te kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro mā te whakamatau i a rātou anō, mā te whakahihi, mā te akiaki rānei, ka piki ake te tiaki i a rātou anō.
Nō reira, me whakaaroaro ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro ki a ia anō: “He aha ōku kare ā-roto ina whakakahoretia ahau e te kiritaki?” He mea nui te tirotiro, te tirotiro i a au anō, me te whakahaere i ngā kare ā-roto kia noho pūmau ai ngā kaiwhakatakoto whakaaro, kia kore ai e tauhohe.
Te Katinga
Ko te tiaki i roto i te kaunhera he tohu kei te kite te kiritaki he mea whakamataku - he whakama pea, he wehi o te whakawakanga, he wheako whanaungatanga morearea rānei. Engari i te ātete atu ki tēnā, me mārama ngā kaunhera hei tikanga tiaki. Mā te hononga whakaora kaha, te whakamana, te whakaaroaro, ngā pātai tuwhera, te whakataurite, te tautohetohe mahi tahi, me ngā tikanga uiuinga hihiri, ka taea e ngā kaunhera te whakaiti i te riri me te tono i ngā kiritaki kia tuwhera. Kāore te huringa pumau e puta mai i te akiaki, engari mai i te whakaaro haumaru, te whakawhirinaki, me te wheako e whakanuia ana ngā kiritaki ahakoa kei te tiaki rātou i a rātou anō. Ki te huarahi tika, ehara te tiaki i te arai tuturu, engari he tatau ki te māramatanga hohonu me te tukanga whakaora whai tikanga ake.
